What Should You Tell And Not Tell Your Lawyer While Fighting For Your Divorce ?

What Should You Tell And Not Tell Your Lawyer While Fighting For Your Divorce ?

In a divorce, emotions can run high, and you might be tempted to tell your lawyer everything. However, there are some things it’s best to keep confidential. Here’s a breakdown of what to tell your lawyer and what to avoid:

Tell Your Lawyer:

  • Everything about your finances: This includes your income, assets (house, car, savings), debts (credit cards, loans), and any financial obligations like child support or alimony you’re currently paying or receiving. Knowing your financial situation helps your lawyer negotiate a fair settlement.
  • Details of your marriage: Be open and honest about the history of your marriage, including the reasons for the divorce. Explain any instances of infidelity, abuse (physical, emotional, verbal), or other significant issues that contributed to the breakdown of the relationship. This information helps your lawyer understand the legal grounds for divorce and build a strong case.
  • Communication with your spouse: Provide copies of any emails, text messages, or social media posts exchanged with your spouse regarding the divorce, child custody, or division of assets. This documentation can be crucial evidence in negotiations or court proceedings.
  • Your expectations: Discuss your desired outcome for the divorce settlement. This includes child custody arrangements, spousal support, and division of assets. Be prepared to adjust your expectations based on legal realities, but your lawyer can’t advocate for what they don’t know you want.
  • Any concerns you have: Don’t hesitate to express any concerns you have about the legal process, the financial implications, or emotional well-being of yourself or your children. Your lawyer can address those concerns and guide you through the process.
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Avoid Telling Your Lawyer:

  • Irrelevant information: While honesty is important, avoid getting into unnecessary details unrelated to the divorce. Don’t share gossip about your spouse or their family. Focus on the facts relevant to the legal issues.
  • Information that could damage your case: Avoid admitting to any illegal activity or behavior that could weaken your position in the divorce settlement, such as hiding assets or infidelity (depending on your state’s laws).
  • Plans to commit a crime: Never discuss plans to harm yourself, your spouse, or your children with your lawyer. They are mandated by law to report any such threats to the authorities.
  • Confidences of Others: Respect the confidentiality of others, especially if it does not pertain directly to your divorce case. Avoid disclosing privileged information about others unless it’s absolutely necessary and relevant.
  • Strategies with Others: Do not discuss legal strategies or confidential information with anyone other than your lawyer. This includes friends, family members, or even your spouse, as it can jeopardize your case.
  • Social Media or Public Statements: Refrain from making public statements or posting on social media about your divorce case. Anything you say publicly could potentially be used against you in court.

Remember:

  • Lawyer-Client Privilege: Communications between you and your lawyer are generally privileged, meaning they cannot be disclosed in court without your consent. However, there are exceptions, so be mindful of what you share.
  • Honesty is Key: While there are some things you shouldn’t tell your lawyer, overall, honesty is crucial. Building trust with your lawyer allows them to develop the strongest possible case for you.
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If you’re unsure whether something is relevant to share with your lawyer, err on the side of caution and discuss it. Your lawyer is there to help you navigate the complexities of divorce, and the more information they have, the better equipped they are to represent your interests.

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